This Week's Top Ten
10. I got all my lesson plans done and organized for my absence. I'm telling you, I am so anally retentively organized, it's nearly disgusting. I have a PeeChee for each unit with unit sub plans and keys on the right, and orginals on the left WITH copy room forms already filled out and attached. I can't control anything after next Friday, but no one can accuse me of not being ready!
9. I saw Ellen Degeneres in concert Wednesday. Roy got us front and center tickets. It was awesome. We had a great time!
8. I gained a few pounds this week, which I was supposed to do. Yay overeating! They'll be gone by the time I'm out of the hospital.
7. At Curves today Helen asked me to help a new person use the machines.
6. Again at Curves some women were asking me on advice as they lose weight and one lady told me that she had been looking at my legs in envy because they are so muscular. She didn't realize that the before and after pictures on the bulletin board are of me and had assumed I was just one of those naturally skinny girls.
5. Our Community Education classes (Training Your Home Computer) are going VERY well. We haven't lost any students (usually a few drop out and that always makes me feel bad). We're getting lots of great compliments on how much they are learning.
4. My Little Brother is going to come hang out with me after I get out of the hospital. HE gets to feed me through a tube and all sorts of fun things! (Hopefully not!)
3. Today I'm going to a bowling party with my students to celebrate my birthday. We've been doing that for three years and it's always a good time. Roy is making a Spongebob Squarecake and a Mickey Head cake. They look AWESOME! I'm telling you, Emeril he isn't, but I'll keep a man who will spend hours decorating cakes for me to share with my students.
2. Next weekend I get to see The Rock. I have been given a "looky no touchy" order by Roy.
1. I broke a tooth this week, but it wasn't so bad that I had to go in right away. I get to get it repaired Monday on my birthday. That's kind of a bummer, but at least it will be done!
Positive Outlook
So the last few days I've been feeling really sorry for myself. I'm worried about the surgery and I'm
really worried about the recovery. I've been reading some kind of scary stuff.
I realized, though, that stress is not a good thing for Hank the Pancreatic Tumor. He feeds on that kind of stuff. I don't want to do anything to make him angrier.
So this morning I gave myself an assignment; to come up with 10 good things about Whipple Fest 2003.
So in my best David Letterman voice I give to you:
Top Ten Good Things about Whipple-Fest 2003
10. No more pesky pancreas to lug around to movies and shopping.
9. Qualtiy time spent with Jerry, Jenny, Ricki, and Oprah.
8. No more exhausting chewing and swallowing, just tip it down the tube!
7. Time to catch up on important reading: People, The National Enquirer, Star.
6. Waited on hand and foot by a cute guy.
5. Bonding time with my family over a vomit bowl.
4. Now a REAL excuse not to clean the house!
3. No one will complain if I spend all day on the computer.
2. Save money on groceries.
And number one good thing about Whipple Fest 2003....
1. HOSPITAL FOOD!!
Clowns are wrong.
Wrong I tell you.
Again I say WRONG!
Even when I was a kid I just didn't "get" clowns.
I wasn't afraid of them. They did not frighten me.
But I was a logical kid. I could see they were grown men dressed in fake noses and fright wigs.
"Why?" I would ask myself.
"Why would a grown man do that?"
"Obviously this man is not normal. GET HIM THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!"
Nope. Don't like clowns. Never did.
Never will.
(Guess what my first job was? No. I am not kidding. I was Sunshine the Clown. The shame.)
Bend Over Baby
So yesterday I was reading a bulletin board and someone seriously posted a frantic post about cookies...apparently these evil cookies were MAKING her eat them...cause you know cookies have that power. They can be pretty rough in their own crumbly kind of way. Especially those oatmeal raisin ones...brutal I tell you! BRUTAL!
So I post something along the line of "Oh for crying out loud, do not let yourself be ruled by a cookie. YOU are the one who puts the food in your mouth. You are the one in control. You are BETTER than this!"
Apparently a number of people did not appreciate my less than subtle form of ass kicking.
Well ya know what kids? This blathering "I'm in pain, send me a WAAAAAAAHmbulance" whining isn't going to get you to your goal. I mean okay, we all need to take a pit stop on our journeys, but some people act like the entire POINT of the journey IS the pit stops. Like somehow "everybody does them" so they are all just okay.
What did Momma used to say?
If everybody jumped off the bridge, would you too?
Sure we all have pit stops on our journey, but the point is to try to AVOID them, not wallow in them while the rest of life just passes us by.
Learn from the mistakes. Take those lessons with you. Don't revel in the mistakes.
It's the wallowing...the wallowing makes me crazy!
So every now and again I just am in this mood to say it plain and simple...quit making excuses, start making plans, meet your goals.
I mean if you're not going to put effort into it, then why bother? It's just going to be a painful source of frustration to you.
Not that I am even remotely suggesting that anyone quit trying to get healthy. I don't care if you have to restart 145 times. It's worth it when you finally make it.
But what I am suggesting is either do the program or stop, get right with your head and figure out what you want and why it is important to you, and then get back on the bandwagon.
The fact is, it is okay to make mistakes, but it isn't okay to just let it go and pretend it didn't happen letting it happen again and again and again. What IS okay is saying "Okay dagnabit, I made a mistake now what can I learn from this? What can I bring from this situation to the next one so that I am better prepared. I may not be perfect next time. Hell, I may not be perfect the next TEN times, but each time I will:
1. Do a little bit better.
2. Take responsibility for my own choices.
3. Learn a little more and come out of it a little wiser."
I know that approach doesn't work for everyone, but you know what? I think that at times it is exactly what people need to hear. I think that when we keep doing the same thing over and over and over and over again sometimes someone needs to step in and say "Okay sweetie, this just is SO not going to happen again. Now take control!"
It isn't until we say to ourselves "It is time to take control! Shame on me for making excuses and playing the victim to a freaking COOKIE! I am BETTER than that!" that we can truly find long term success.
At least that's what I believe...I don't know. I could be wrong.
